What if, we think about individual and team performance differently?
What if, we focused on individual moments rather than big dramatic actions?
And to push this theme, what if we started to think about the idea that some moments are more important than others?
And what if, we could be at our best in these moments that matter?
There is a lot of ‘what if’s’ here.
But lets start.
What do I mean by moments that matter?
It could be:
A sentence we choose to say — or don’t.
A reaction we soften — or let harden.
A question we ask — or avoid.
A pause we take — or rush past.
Moments that matter are not always obvious.
They don’t always look important from the outside.
But they have disproportionate impact — on outcomes, relationships, confidence, and direction.
A moment that matters is not defined by how public it is, how long it lasts, or how dramatic it appears.
It’s defined by what’s at stake — internally, externally, or both.
Moments that matter often share a few common features:
- There is some pressure, even if it’s subtle
- There is uncertainty — you don’t quite know what to do
- There is emotion — nervousness, hope, frustration, excitement
- There is choice — how you respond will shape what happens next
That choice might take seconds.
But its effects can last far longer.
Moments that matter happen everywhere.
Here are a few examples;
At work
- Being asked an unexpected question in a meeting
- Giving feedback that could either build or damage trust
- Pitching an idea when the room feels sceptical
- Deciding how to respond to pressure from above
At home
- How you respond when a partner is tense or withdrawn
- A conversation with your child when they’re struggling
- Choosing whether to listen or fix
- Deciding to say what really matters — or let it slide
With others
- Meeting someone new and sensing the tone
- Handling conflict without escalating it
- Switching from “task mode” to “people mode”
- Reading the room and adjusting your approach
Some of these moments last minutes.
Many last seconds.
But they matter because they shape:
- how others experience you
- how you experience yourself
- the direction the situation takes
When you look closely, moments that matter share a deeper pattern.
They are transitional moments — moments where something is about to shift.
You’re moving:
- from calm to pressure
- from preparation to performance
- from thinking to acting
- from one person or context to another
But here is the problem.
In these moments, people often default to what’s familiar, comfortable or what has worked in the past.
- the same thinking mode (i.e. what I call Box Mode or Ball Mode)
- the same tone
- the same habits
This is understandable.
But what worked five months ago may not fit this moment.
Why people struggle in moments that matter
Most people don’t struggle because they lack skill, intelligence, or experience.
They struggle because they don’t switch in the moment.
Under pressure, we tend to:
- narrow our thinking
- cling to control
- repeat familiar approaches
- stay loyal to one mode of thinking
I call this mode loyalty — sticking with the way we’re thinking even when the moment has changed.
The result is a mismatch:
- between yourself and the situation
- between yourself and other people
- between what you could do and what you actually do
This is what I call the golfing dilemma.
I often hit the ball beautifully on the range yet the moment I step forward on the course I crumble.
Same person same clubs, same ball yet quite different results.
It can be the same in a presentation, meeting or interview for example no matter how much you rehearse.
Moments that matter are real-time moments.
This is crucial.
Moments that matter are not moments you can prepare endlessly for.
They happen:
- in real conversations
- in live interactions
- under time pressure
- amid emotion and uncertainty
That’s why advice like “reflect later” or “practice more” often misses the point.
Reflection and preparation matter — but they happen before and after.
Moments that matter happen during.
They require real-time thinking.
This is why I have developed Switch Thinking.
It exists for one reason:
To help people get in sync with the moment — in real time.
It helps you:
- notice when a moment matters
- recognise the mode you’re in
- sense whether it fits the situation and the people involved
- make a small, deliberate switch if it doesn’t
Not tomorrow.
Not after the fact.
In the moment itself.
That switch might be:
- from control to curiosity
- from logic to imagination
- from reaction to presence
- from seriousness to playfulness
Often, it takes two minutes or less.
Moments that matter are not rare — they’re constant
One of my most important insights is this:
Moments that matter aren’t occasional.
They are woven through everyday life.
Once you start noticing them, you realise:
- they happen in kitchens, cars, test messages, cafe’s
- they happen between people as much as within people
- they are where growth, connection, and impact actually occur
And the good news is this:
You don’t need to change who you are.
You don’t need long programs or complex frameworks.
You just need the ability to switch — when it matters.
A simple definition of moments that matter
Moments that matter are real-time situations where how you think, feel, or respond makes a meaningful difference to what happens next.
Switch Thinking is designed for exactly those moments.
Because that’s where life actually changes and where you can make a big difference.